keep smile

Blonde Car Accident
One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.
The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.
He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.
Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.
The blonde started laughing.
This made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.
This time the blonde laughed even harder.
Livid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.
The blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.
The blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"

 
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On day, a man was riding a horse when he passed a dog on the road. “Good morning,” the dog said.
“I didn’t know dogs could talk,” the man said.
“Neither did I,” the horse said.

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There was once a wife so jealous that when her husband came home one night and she couldn't find hairs on his jackets she yelled at him, "Great, so now you're cheating on me with a bald woman!"
The next night, when she didn't smell any perfume, she yelled again by saying, "She's not only bald, but she's too cheap to buy any perfume!"

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TEACHER : Maria, go to the map and find North America.
MARIA : Here it is!
TEACHER : Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS : Maria!

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TEACHER : Why are you late, FHAROLD : A teacher
Wife: Honey..... What are You Looking for ?
Husband : Nothing.
Wife : Nothing...?? U've been reading our marriage certificate 4 an hour ??
Husband : I was just looking 4 the expiry date.

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Q - What is the Difference Between Mother & Wife ?
A - One Woman Brings U into this world crying... & the other ensures U
Continue to do so.

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Wife : Do you want dinner?
Husband : Sure, what are my choices?
Wife : Yes and no.

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Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?
Husband: When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your
picture and the problem disappears.
Wife: You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
Husband: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, "What other problem can
there be greater than this one?"

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Girl: When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and
lighten your burden.
Boy: It's very kind of you, darling, But I don't have any worries or troubles.
Girl: Well that's because we aren't married yet.

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Son: Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady.
Mom: Well, you have done the right thing.
Son: But mum, I was sitting on daddy's lap.

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A newly
married man asked his wife, "Would you have married me if my father
hadn't left me a fortune?"
"Honey," the woman replied sweetly, "I'd have married you NO MATTER WHO LEFT
YOU A FORTUNE"

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Father to son after exam: "let me see your report card."
Son: "My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents."

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Interviewer to Millionaire: To whom do you owe your success as a millionaire?"
Millionaire: "I owe everything to my wife."
Interviewer: "Wow, she must be some woman. What were you before you married her?"
Millionaire: " Billionaire"

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Girl to her boyfriend: One kiss and I'll be yours forever.
The guy replies: Thanks for the warning.


have a nice time